”A guy walks into a bar with a severed head in a cooler box…”

[Varoitus: ÄÄRIMMÄISEN TURHAN MERKINNÄN päätösosa! Jatkaa lennosta.]

Geoffrey: ”I have been offered a job.”
”Let me guess, someone’s hired you to slander the dead. You’re very good at that.”
Geoffrey: ”No, they’ve asked me to be the Artistic Director.” (kikattaa)
Ellen: ”WHAT.”
Geoffrey: ”Well, interim Artistic Director while they search for a real one, but you know how long that process could take — weeks, months, years…”
Ellen: ”You can’t come back, you’re insane.”
Geoffrey: ”Apparently that doesn’t matter in the theatre.”
Ellen: ”Geoffrey, this is my home. I don’t want you in my home.”
Geoffrey: ”Frankly, Ellen, your home could use a little cleaning. And anyway, don’t you think this is what Oliver would have wanted? You and I, thrust together by his tragic death? …Or maybe you don’t agree? Why don’t we ask him!” (nostaa kylmälaukun baaritiskille) ”Is this what you wanted, you sly old devil? —’That’s right, Geoffrey!’
Ellen: ”You didn’t–”
Geoffrey: ”M-hm. I promised him that I would look after his head. And unlike some people, I keep my word.”

Anna: ”It’s not heavy at all.”
Geoffrey: ”It’s much lighter without the ego.”


Anna: ”You sound cranky.”
Richard: ”Anna. All I do, all day, is beg for money. I am way beyond cranky. I wish I was cranky.”

Geoffrey: ”I do not want to be insane… I refuse to be insane…”
Oliver: ”That’s the spirit!”

Geoffrey: ”I’m not mentally equipped.”
May: ”If you ask me, we could use a little madness around here. What’s on the agenda today?
Geoffrey: ”Nothing. Avoiding people.”
May: ”Good — ease into the job.”


Geoffrey: ”Forget about perfection. There’s nothing more boring than perfection. Imprecision, fear — this is what gets them to their feet.”
Jack: ”Well, I should be brilliant then.”
Geoffrey: ”And it is not that big of a play.”
Jack: ”Yeah, right!”
Geoffrey: ”Come here. Sit down. Sit. Now, look at me. I want you to think of it in terms of six soliloquies. OK? Count’em off with me. O, that this too, too solid flesh… O, what a rogue and peasant slave am I… To be or not to be… ’Tis now the very witching hour — that’s a short one, that’s only twelve lines… Now might I do it pat… How all occasions do inform against me… That’s it. Six. And the rest, as they say, is silence.”
Jack: ”I think there’s some dialogue in between.”
Geoffrey: ”Filler.”

Jack: ”I’m gonna throw up.”
Geoffrey: ”Use it.”


Ellen: ”Why did you run away?”
Geoffrey: ”That was an entirely different situation.”
Ellen: ”Yes, you ran away in the middle of a performance.”
Geoffrey: ”Not now, please!
…Okay. It was you.”
Ellen: ”Oh, come on.”
Geoffrey: ”You and Oliver. And a broken heart. Or, maybe it was just my time to go whohoohohohoo mad! I don’t know, I give up!”

Ellen: ”They tried to go on without you.”
Geoffrey: ”Yeah, well. You can only go so far without your Hamlet before you hit a speech.”

Geoffrey: ”I could offer nothing. Nothing. I would have cut my throat, but you’re not allowed to do that in front of subscribers, so …I jumped in there.”
(Molemmat katsovat lavastehautaan)
Ellen: ”You didn’t come out for seven years.”

Geoffrey: ”I think human beings, all human beings, are by nature selfish and so when we mourn, we are actually mourning a part of ourselves that has died. You have now lost the person that defined you. And so, in a sense, you have lost your identity. Who are you now without her? You are uncomfortable inside your own skin. You have become a stranger, even to yourself.”

Policeman: ”Him? Were gonna have to keep him for observation.”
Anna: ”Why?”
Policeman: ”Because he was found drunk, in tights, trying to stab people with a sword.”
Anna: ”That’s just Geoffrey being Geoffrey.”

”Juuri saamamme tiedon mukaan…”

Geoffrey: ”What is happening here? You’re dead!”
Oliver: ”Apparently, there’s an afterlife. Despite what they taught us in university.”

Geoffrey: ”Let’s cut to the chase, shall we? Are you dead or am I insane?”
Oliver: ”I don’t see why those two thoughts are mutually exclusive.”
Geoffrey: ”Well if I’m insane then I’m talking to myself, aren’t I!”
Oliver: ”And I’m a figment of your deranged mind? I’d rather be dead, thank you very much.”

Geoffrey: ”No, honestly. Why are you haunting me like this? Do you have some kind of purpose? Is there some sort of mystical task or something, that you’re supposed to perform before they let you move on?! Because I tell ya, I’ll help you, my friend, I would very much like to help EXPEDITE THAT PROCESS!”
Sarkastinen Oliver: ”I’m sorry, Geoffrey, I don’t know why I’m here. There was no pamphlet in the coffin.”

Richard: ”Everyone cries when they’re stabbed. There’s no shame in that.”


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